He never noticed but I look like her in the dark
by sleepingtigersbox
Summary: "And that is one of the weirdest moments in my life because he isn't saying sorry for annoying me, I can tell. He just is sorry I haven't healed." Beck/Jade
1. An Indian Boy with Brown Eyes

**Disclaimer: The characters and the setting and all that jazz is owned by Dan Schneider and/or Nickelodeon. I own nothing.**

_December 6_

_Fucking imbeciles can't even walk straight! Now my cut reopened! Gah! _Someone coming close to me, way close to me cut my mental rant short.

"I'm sorry but are you okay?" the intruder asked.

"No I am not! I am bleeding you idiot!" I took a deep breath and looked up to see him still staring at my leg looking worried. "On top of that I have some random pedophile asking me stupid questions! Get away imbecile!"

I stormed away from the boy but weirdly enough the boy just kept advancing. I felt like punching air, in fact I think I will.

"Crap!" the boy said as my fist landed on his jaw.

"Now now, do you kiss your mother with that tongue?" I couldn't help but laugh as he looked up with weird eyes like sadness but something else was there eyes.

"My mom is dead." The boy said and I could feel the smirk leave my face and I actually look at him now.

He was probably no older than me, definitely taller but not that tall. With dark Indian features and the biggest most open brown eyes I have ever seen. _Jadelyn West how are eyes open? Well because you actually know what's going on… like you can tell what he is thinking, an open book. Jade that is beyond stupid!_ Once again a certain Indian boy interrupted my one-person fight with myself.

"You okay?" he asked searching my not-so open eyes.

"Yeah." I replied, even I was shocked I answered non-sarcastically. Mom would be proud.

He turned to walk away and it hit me, I'll never see this boy again. I locked eyes with the back of his head and thought over our conversation it wasn't until he was a few feet away my mouth opened, on it own accord I might add.

"I am sorry your mom is dead." I say loud enough I'm sure he could hear me.

Surely enough he heard. He turns back around and lock eyes with me for a split second, those beautiful brown eyes. He smiles a bit and then turns and leaves.

And then it hit me; I'll never see this boy again.

_Three Years Later, December 6_

"Look princess unless you want my foot up your ass-" my frantic mother coming to glare at me and fuss over Madeline's hair cut me off from my threat to my sister- or as I like to call her, the devil's child.

"Jadelyn West! Go get me some more flowers for your sister's hair!" Cynthia West ordered me without even looking up from Madeline's wig. Typical.

I get off the couch I was sitting in and dump all of Madeline's clothes on the floor. Yup that is what she was making me do, said reason for half-way said threat before.

"Jade my clothes!" Madeline screeched but I was already out of the bloody room.

"Crazy people making me hold there clothes-" someone's body colliding with mine cut me off.

I look up to see a Indian boy steadying me, not just any Indian boy though, the dead-mother Indian boy with the same open eyes he had 3 years ago.

"Why is it you always have to interrupt me when I'm mad?" I ask as I stand up, ignoring his hand and walk past him.

"How's the cut?" he asks which makes me stop dead on my tracks.

Okay so I was sure he would have forgotten, okay I was counting he would have forgotten. I hoped he thought I was some random kid who was talking stupidities. But now as I turned around and meet his eyes and take in his amused expression I know he remembers me. And I feel stupid as fuck.

"Healed, how's the dead mom?" Okay in all fairness I wasn't trying to sound that bad that was just the only thing I knew about him.

I saw him chuckle though and nod. "Still dead."

"Great now if you won't dump into me again…" I motioned to the exit but once I turned around and reached it I noticed he must have thought this was a formal invitation, either that or he had boundary issues.

"Look lost Indian puppy-" I growled as I turned around but I was meet with his face really close to mine. Like inches away, something I was not expecting.

"Yes?" he asks while smiling and probably holding back a laugh.

"Stay away." I scowl pushing him back a bit but the guy was strong.

The weirdest thing happen though, one minute my hand is on his shoulder pushing him away, the next he grabs my wrist and turns it over to a bruise on my forearm.

I see he is trying to open his mouth, trying to say what so many before him have tried to say. But like many before him he comes up blank. This however is good, it brings me back to reality.

"I said stay away!" I scream but I try not to be too loud so nobody around will hear. I yanked my wrist from his now limb fingers and punch him square in the nose.

"I am sorry." He said repeating the same sentiment I had once told him. And that is one of the weirdest moments in my life because he isn't saying sorry for annoying me, I can tell. He just is sorry I haven't healed.

I don't know how I know this but looking into those deep brown eyes I can tell with three words I have heard countless times he just made me feel what no one else has ever accomplished. All those who tried to say something after they see the bruises… he makes me feel like he is actually sorry.

**A/N: Kinda short… sorry. Next update will be soon-ish.**

**~sleepingtigersbox**


	2. Gus, No Name and Beck

**Disclaimer: Victorious and all it's characters are owned by Dan Schneider and/or Nickelodeon. I own nothing not claim to.**

"Jadelyn West!" my mother's bizarre shriek rang through the whole common room. She came out of the room looking rather frustrated and one of her forehead veins was doing the little throbbing thing.

"Sorry Cyn, I promised Steve here we'd get some water!" I said hurriedly as I took a confused Indian boy and pushed him out through a hall and a few feet away from where I left my mom standing.

_Well I hope her vein doesn't 'pop'._

_On second though…_

"Jadelyn."

Okay only my mothers calls me that so my first initial reaction was to scream that she was a witch but then I noticed the name wasn't screamed –something my mother was incapable of doing- and it came from behind me with a masculine tone attached to it.

"What could you possibly want?" I growled as I glared at the Indian boy.

He simply took my arm and started leading me away into more hallways of the theater.

"Let go off me!" I screamed over and over as I tried to punch him with just one arm. I actually succeeded at hitting his arm, which only prompted him to throw me over his shoulder.

"Let go off me unless you want to end up next to your mom!" I kept screaming more stupidities and hitting his back with my hands but the dude wouldn't budge and just kept dragging me away past halls.

"I swear if you don't put me down I will personally make sure you can never have any-"

"Jadelyn shut up!" the boy cried as he stopped walking and set me down on the stage of the huge theater.

"My name is Jade and if you even touch me again I will castrate you." I growled and he looked amused until he looked me in the eyes, I guess the joke stopped being funny because he got a worried look in his eyes now.

"Hey you wanted to get away from your mom…" He suddenly said and the stupid smile crept back up in his face. "I won't touch you if you don't kill me…"

I turned around from the Indian kid but the pang in my gut told me not to, I shouldn't I mean this had to be destiny, right? _Jade stop being a pansy._ I took a deep breath and turned back around.

"Deal." I said as I looked around the big theater my sister dance academy used for recitals.

I looked back to see he was sitting at the edge of the stage with his legs dangling of the edge. I took a deep breath and squared my shoulders, I was Jade West and Jade West was _not _afraid of some guy.

"What are you even doing here?" I asked as I sat down next to him but with my legs crossed instead of dangling.

"My school competes here too and I agreed to play guitar for some parts." He explained without looking at me, he was looking at the empty seats.

"And you are nervous." I said looking at him and his thoughtful eyes. "Wimp." I muttered under my breath and laughed a bit.

"Oh come on that not very nice." He said disapprovingly but I could see his eyes sparkling with humor plus he was smiling just the tiniest bit.

"Sue me."

"I'd prefer to kiss you instead," he said looking at me with those goddamn brown eyes of his but only the teasing I saw in his eyes kept me from hitting him.

"I don't kiss wimps." I smiled.

"I don't even play guitar!" He defended himself laughing a bit and I am ashamed to say I laughed a bit too, for a like a half a second.

"That's amazing though you go to a big artsy school and can't play guitar." I said looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm studying to be an actor, my friend Andre just needed someone to help him with the music."

"Oh really mister actor guy," I stood up and looked at him in the eyes. "Let's see what you got."

"Challenge accepted." He grinned a bit standing up and looking at me seriously.

I had to admit I seriously had to admire the dude, I never told anyone cause well no one would really care but I always loved to act. This guy looked so sure of himself, like he seriously loved to act.

"What do you want me to do Jady?" He asked clearly enjoying how I squirmed at the name. I narrowed my eyes at him and his smile disappeared almost instantly but I could see he was still trying not to laugh.

"Okay you are a desperate fishermen who hasn't gotten any fish and is really in debt and in need of money. Oh and your wife just left you for a girl." I smirked at the insane storyline I just gave him; really it just popped in my head.

"Want to be my wife or the slutty sea hoe I then make my new wife?" He asked seriously before wiggling his eyebrows at me. Okay I really couldn't help but laugh.

"How about neither." I smirked and then turned serious. "Action Gus!"

"My name is Gus?" He asked not really getting the whole 'Action thing' meant to start the scene.

"Do you have a problem with the name Gus?" I asked as I narrowed my eyes at him.

"No but really… Gus?" he asked me with a serious face.

"Oh don't complain! You don't even have a name!" I debated.

"So now I'm no name."

"No! Your name is Gus… your actual name is no name." I argued which made him raise his eyebrow in amusement.

"Ugh!" I growled as I stomped over to him. "Try to keep up idiot, your character's name is Gus. _You _are no name." I said really slowly as I resisted the urge to slap him.

"But I thought my name was Beck?" He asked amused.

"Beck?" I suddenly asked ignoring the acting thing and the whole character discussion. "What kind of name is Beck?" I asked as I started to laugh.

"A name. What kind of name is Jadelyn?" He asked smiling, weird kid.

"Touché." I smirked at him.

"Okay so this fisherman, let's call him Gus is newly divorced from his lesbian wife or ex-wife or whatever and in debt." He stated and nodded. "Sounds stupid."

"Watch it Beckett." I growled narrowing my eyes at him.

"How good are you at acting?" He suddenly asked and I lost my anger for a minute.

"Hell if I know." I said trying to act casual but acting was a sore subject for me.

"Right." He said in a strange tone as he started walking around the stage, pacing was more like it. "Okay so I'm going to ask you to marry me and you can just play along. Easy enough?"

"Yeah, yeah just start." I might have been wrong but I could have sworn I saw him smile from the corner of my eye. _Great, what did I get myself into?_

**A/N: Okay so I tried making this one longer than the last one. How was it?**

**~sleepingtigersbox**


	3. Proposals and Coconuts

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. Dan Schneider and/or Nickelodeon own Victorious.**

He walked around me for a while and I seriously was getting annoyed because I clearly must have forgotten the moment I became a freaking statue at a museum.

"Relax Jade." He said from behind but he was close, way too close than I expected him to be.

_Don't let it show Jade._

"You try being gawked at like a statue then tell me to relax!" I narrowed my eyes into tiny slits as I glared at the emptiness in front of me.

"Relax Jadelyn." He tried again this time one of his hands was on my shoulder squeezing it lightly.

"I swear _Beckett_ if you tell me to relax one more time…" I trailed off unable to continue my well thought out threat.

He was way too close for comfort. I could feel his breath on my neck and I could almost feel the heat that radiated of him. I could almost picture his body close to mine, his weird long sleeved grey shirt covering his stomach… his flat stomach. _Think of dead pigeons Jade just stop thinking of his body!_ Yup even inner me agreed that was dangerous territory.

"That's it Jade relax honey, your dad is going to be okay the doctor said the boat barely touched him." He said as he wrapped an arm around my waist.

Now I get it, the scene had somehow started and when it started I had little to no idea. But hey two people could play at this game.

"I know _Beckett_ but he was so close, and so were you… what if the boat had injured you?" I started to turn around and to my not-so surprise his head was inches away from mine. "I can't loose you."

"Jade you will never lose me." He said putting a gentle finger under my jaw and making me look at him.

"You mean the world to me." I whispered and I could even feel tears starting to fill my eyes. Perfect.

"Beck I know they said you and me would never work, you are so sweet and good and I know I am not but it means everything you stayed as long as you have. You say you love me but what if one day that isn't enough, I am not my sister… I am not perfect, and I don't try to be." I had my game face on but a few fake tears were spilling out of my eyes.

"Jade that kiss with your sister meant nothing, she kissed me and I pushed her away. Jadelyn, you know you are perfect to me." He said brushing the stray tears from my cheeks.

"Lola had said that she liked you and then when you and her kissed I just thought-" I was suddenly silenced by his lips meeting mine.

I would have punched him but this was a stage kiss. His soft lips moving on mine and the way he held me were just him proving how good of an actor he was. I meant nothing to him; hell I learned his name 5 minutes ago. _But he might be starting to mean something to you._ So I pulled away.

"Jade everyday since I meet you I haven't stopped thinking about you, your soft eyes, your beautiful black hair, those ridiculous streaks of colour on your hair and your powerful left hook." He smiled a little even though you could still see tenderness and 'love' on his face. "Three years ago I meet a beautiful pale, sad girl, a mad girl and I walked away without her. I don't want to make the same mistake twice Jade… marry me."

His eyes were prying into mine and I had to admit the tears that had I had slowed down had now mixed in with some actual tears that had sprung up there at some point during that speech. I blinked fast clearing my eyes. _Jade back in character, back in character!_

"Oh you are good." I smiled desperate to stop this scene.

"Oh so I don't even get an answer?" he asked smiling as he suddenly looked really casual, back to reality.

"You get to not get kicked in the crotch." I smiled as I let my messenger bag fall to the ground with a 'thud' before I sat on the stage again.

"Ouch? You would have really kicked me?" he asked sitting in front of me.

"Dude I don't do cheesy." I told him laughing as I opened my messenger bag.

"That wasn't cheesy, that was romantic." He corrected me smiling as he leaned back on his arms.

"Yeah if your version of romantic is reminiscing about me hitting you and then a big separation." I said trying to act like it was bad in reality yes I would have hit him in the crotch, Jade West doesn't do romantic but it was actually pretty good, sweet even.

"Okay so let's fix it then." He said sitting back up and brushing the dirt of his hands before taking my hands in his.

"Jadelyn West I just came back from a strip club and decided I wanted my very own girl to entertain me. Marry me?" he asked smirking and I couldn't help but laugh a bit.

"Oh honey! Of coarse I will!" I laughed before pulling my hands free and shaking my head.

"So that was the line that would work on Jadelyn?" he asked smirking as he ran his hand through his hair. "You are a true romantic."

"Okay no in reality that would have earned you a castration." I said truthfully.

"What is with you and my man parts?" he asked with a hint of amusement in his voice as he looked at me.

"Hey no guy that is with me will be going to strip clubs." I defended and it was my turn to lean back using my arms for support.

"So then if not the romantic way and not the jerk way what exactly would be the line to your heart?" he asked and this time he looked seriously curious. No amusement just pure curiosity.

My hand creeps up into my messenger bag and I wrap my hand around the plastic object waiting for the best moment. He is still waiting for my answer so he doesn't really notice and if he does he doesn't lead on.

"Don't be lazy and find out." I say rather seriously and it seemed to catch him off guard because he got a sort of bemused/surprised face going on before he composes himself and smiles.

"I should have known you'd make me work for it." He smiles then blinks rapidly as the flash from the Polaroid camera stuns him for a few minutes.

"Now I know you want to be an actor but I wouldn't recommend modeling." I say as I take the picture from the camera and put the thing down shaking the picture to reveal him.

I excepted him to say something but oddly enough he just stayed silent and smiled slightly before reaching for the picture. I made a 'tsk, tsk' noise while I extended my arm and putting the picture out of reach.

He finally got the picture though and studied it from every angle before putting it next to his head and grinning like an idiot.

"Does it look like me?" he asked with that stupid grin still in place.

"Nop, he is prettier." I laughed as I snatched the picture and stuffed it in my bag.

Suddenly some lights when off on the stage while other went on, some changed colours and some started to move in weird patters.

"What are you two doing on that stage?" a dark tanned guy yelled from the other side of the room.

"Oh hush up Lane, have a coconut." Another man spoke up but this man was sitting in a chair close by but that had been hidden by darkness. This guy looked a lot weirder, hair sticking to every direction a coconut with a few colored straws and his clothes looked well dirty.

"Sikowitz? How long have you been there?" Beck asks the dude with the coconut that is starting to stand up and walk closer.

"My coconuts told me to come to see Miss West here act." He said as if it was normal, at all.

Beck however although slightly confused accepted the answer and jumped off the stage. He man-hugged the guy before taking the coconut and looking at up at me.

"And what do you think about _Miss Jadelyn West_?" Beck asked smirking up at me. I really needed to get my name changed.

"She is definitely talented, Lane get the girl some papers!" Sikowitz yelled at the tanned man who looked surprised.

"What are we talking about here?" I snapped as I stood up with my bag firmly in my hand.

"He wants you to join Hollywood Arts." Beck said smiling slightly as he hopped back on stage. "What do you think about them apples?"

"Whatever." I said and tried to hide the smile.

**A/N: Jade wasn't **_**that**_** Jade-sh in this episode but I tried my best to not have her giggly and loving but still not totally be a bitch to Beck. I hope the 'proposal' was good for you guys. **

_**Important: Oh and I want to change the title so if anybody has any ideas, sharing and caring is fun.**_

**~sleepingtigersbox**


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